You Do Not Have to Be Good

A Memoir
Dayna’s father committed a murder-suicide when she was just two years old, shrouding their family in grief, mystery, and trauma. What could cause him to take such drastic action, ending the course of his life? Twenty years later, Dayna is determined to find out.
When Dayna MacCulloch was two years old, her father killed his friend and then himself. Twenty years later, she went back to see where it happened - where her father morphed from the hippie, homesteading, jack-of-all-trades man that everyone loved to the guy who took his rifle off the shelf one night and shot his friend in the face. Standing in the place where he did it, a wildfire of unanswered questions - the ones she'd suppressed all her life - blazed open within her. The life she was living no longer made sense, no longer was enough. While most of her friends were applying for big jobs, getting married, and getting pregnant, she bought a one-way ticket to a Greek island - determined to, as Rilke advised, live the questions for as long as she could. You Do Not Have to Be Good is the story of where that choice led her: to five different countries over the course of five years. It is a candid, intimate memoir about the ways that loss and landscape guide and shape us, the ways strangers can heal us, and what it means to finally come home.

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