A Memoir of Transition
A warm, sharply written memoir about embracing one's truest self in a world that demands gender fit in neat boxes.

'This book is as sharp as razors, but it also pulses with a passionate, desperate, human urgency for truth and liberation. I am deeply grateful to have read it' Elizabeth Gilbert

As the daughter of two well-to-do English parents and the wife of a handsome, successful man, Oliver Radclyffe checked off every box - marriage, children (four), a white-picket fence surrounding a stately home in Connecticut and a golden retriever named Biscuit.

But beneath the shiny veneer, Oliver was desperately trying to stay afloat - his hair was falling out in clumps, he couldn't eat and his mood swings often brought him to tears. And then, on an otherwise unremarkable afternoon, Oliver Radclyffe woke up and realized the life of a trapped housewife was not for him. In fact, Oliver had spent his entire life denying the deepest, truest parts of himself.

Despite the challenges he faced, leaving a marriage and reintroducing himself to his children, Oliver realized there was no way for him to go back to the beautiful lie of his previous life. Not if he wanted to survive.

Frighten the Horses is a trans man's coming of age story, about a housewife who initially comes out as a lesbian and tentatively, at first, steps into the world of queerness. With growing courage and the support of his newfound community, Oliver is finally able to face the question of his gender identity and become the man he is supposed to be.